Taking stock and setting myself free… in the Garden

It has been a long time since I pondered about my stay in the Garden.  I have been walking along thinking I know my way.  Now I am not sure about this road I am taking lately.  I think I got lost somewhere.  You see, I have been moaning and groaning about my pace:  “I am not growing fast enough… not doing nearly enough to make sure I succeed and achieve what I believe I ought to achieve.”  I have been thinking: ‘me, me, me… what I have to do to achieve for me… succeed for me … do it right for me’.  Even my attempts at doing good seem to have just been for me… I fear it may have been to make me feel good that I have done something that will make people admire me.

Today, I am pulling no punches.  Do I really do anything for anybody?  Is there any real possibility that I can do anything, that in the end is not about me?  I look, and I see that others have done something that is good…Mother Theresa, Mahatma Ghandi, Nelson Mandela, St Francis of Assisi, Joan of Arc… something that was for the good of everybody.  It just so turned out that doing their good works gave them recognition… like the lioness who does what she needs to keep safe, feed well, and keep her family safe and well… but who then has contributed greatly to giving her species that famous title: ‘King of Beasts’

 It does not take long when watching her in action to recognize how well she does this… or how determined she is, sometimes in the face of prey larger or faster than she is.  It does not take long to recognize how well she uses the resources she has been given to realize what she needs to… working in hand with her environment, with other females and sometimes a few males… working with her cubs to hunt their prey and then sharing it… not caring what you or I may think of her tactics, but simply going along on her way.  She is doing the good for herself and her family that she was created to do, in the way that she was created to do it. 

So, back to me and my intentions.  It is time to take a lesson from the lioness.  To learn and know myself, my purpose, my mission, my abilities, my limits, the kind of help I will need to realize my dreams.  Yet most of all, it is time to pray that God grant me understanding of the purpose for which He created me, the mission He has for me at any point in time, and the grace to fulfill it unselfishly… not because anyone will admire me, but because God loves me… and irrespective of what anyone may think about what I am doing at the time, because it is according to God’s will.  You see… He created me to love and be free to do His will… that is the bottom line.
Taking my cue from the lioness

Taking my cue from the lioness... and setting myself free

Yes, it is time to be free, and that itself is a wonderful dream.  If you are not there yet, do join me …

Come… walk with me in the Garden

Copyright © 2011, Ophelia Swai. All Rights Reserved.


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One thought on “Taking stock and setting myself free… in the Garden

  1. Davis Onsakia February 18, 2011 at 11:53 am Reply

    I like your kind of soliloquy! Just thinking what you can do about yourself and humanity and others and then winding up by acknowledging our God. Quite impressive.

    Have a nice walk in the garden.

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